Monthly Archive for June, 2007

Mother#$!@$ Panasonic.

My downward spiral continues. This Saturday, my $2600 TV blew out. I have a PT-50LC13, a Panasonic LCD rear projection unit. Apparently, I am not the only one with this problem, because there was a class action litigation regarding defective units such as mine. They even have a slick webpage – Anyway, you have to have your lamp blow 3 times in order to be eligible for (1) a $1000 rebate towards a TV $1500 or greater, or (2) a replacement set, using DLP technology (I have heard it is a 56″ DLP set). Well, thats special. Problem is, I have a problem with my ballast. Supposedly this is the thing that supplies adequate and controlled power to the lamp. Mine is blown, and its gonna cost me like $500 bucks to fix it. And I don’t think it’s covered by the settlement. I am not entirely sure whether or not the settlement, which was made in a state court in California, and of which I wasn’t properly notified of, is binding upon me. So I might take Panasonic to small claims court. Get ready, Bitches.


I am a big believer in peaks and valleys. Sometimes my arc is rising, sometimes it’s falling. It is sort of like in Swingers how when one guy is riding high, the other guy is in the dumps. When Jon Favraeu’s character finally comes around, its Vince Vaughn who is eating shit. And just when you think it can’t get worse, it does. Life is never too busy to give you that last extra kick in the nuts.

And I mean that literally. As in my right ball hurts. I think it might be my Aeron chair and its lack of support in the crotchal region. Some might say, “Ewwww! Too much information!” To those people, I say a hearty “Fuck you.” What the fuck are you doing reading the obsessive rants of a prick so self involved he has his own blog anyway? Either love me, or leave me alone.

I also mean it figuratively. The fact of the matter is, everyone lets you down in the end. Including, without limitation, everyone you love, and everyone that loves you, even if those groups aren’t mutually exclusive (and they never are). Lawyers: sorry for that last bit about without limitation. I couldn’t resist. Only fucking lawyers talk like that.

Anywho, the only thing that cheered me up today was HBO’s The Flight of the Conchords. It is the funniest goddamned show I have seen in years. Even after I emptied my bladder I had to tie my cock in a knot just to keep from pissing myself with laughter. You can watch the first episode at HBO, here. The whole thing is brilliant, and though my favorite part is the first song, another scene made me laugh just as hard at myself:

“It’s just that I think she might be the one.”



“What makes you think that?”

“You just know. When it happens to you, you’ll know.”

“You said Michelle was the one.”

“Yah, she’s the one.”

“You said Claire was the one.”

“Yah, she’s another one.”

“So you get more than one one.”

“Some people are lucky, I’ve had a few ones.”

Anyway I’m out. Choke on my fucking brilliance.