An unexpected second in my now multi-part series, Virginia is for Douchebags. For the first part, see right meow. Virginia hits a (perhaps unsurprising) new low:
WASHINGTON, Dec. 20 In a letter sent to hundreds of voters this month, Representative Virgil H. Goode Jr., Republican of Virginia, warned that the recent election of the first Muslim to Congress posed a serious threat to the nation’s traditional values.
Mr. Goode was referring to Keith Ellison, the Minnesota Democrat and criminal defense lawyer who converted to Islam as a college student and was elected to the House in November. Mr. Ellison’s plan to use the Koran during his private swearing-in ceremony in January had outraged some Virginia voters, prompting Mr. Goode to issue a written response to them, a spokesman for Mr. Goode said.
In his letter, which was dated Dec. 5, Mr. Goode said that Americans needed to “wake up” or else there would “likely be many more Muslims elected to office and demanding the use of the Koran.”
“I fear that in the next century we will have many more Muslims in the United States if we do not adopt the strict immigration policies that I believe are necessary to preserve the values and beliefs traditional to the United States of America and to prevent our resources from being swamped,” said Mr. Goode, who vowed to use the Bible when taking his own oath of office.
Here is a link to the article. Wow. Seriously? Here is a pic. One guess as to who is Virgil H. Goode, Junior, and who is Keith Ellison. Anyway, after the George Allen incident, I would have thought that Virginia had learned its lesson about opening its fat piehole. You see, this tells the rest of America that people from Virginia are stupid and bigoted. “But one bigot doesn’t represent the whole state of Virginia! Waaaah!”
Oh, but he does. You see, Goode is not some hobo wearing feathers and screaming at your pet on the street. He is Virginia’s representative. In case you don’t know what that means, say hello to my little friend, Merriam Webster:
Main Entry: 2representative
Function: noun
1 : one that represents another or others: as a (1) : one that represents a constituency as a member of a legislative body (2) : a member of the house of representatives of the United States Congress or a state legislature b : one that represents another as agent, deputy, substitute, or delegate usually being invested with the authority of the principal c : one that represents a business organization d : one that represents another as successor or heir.
This man represents Virginia! Therefore, I shall continue to impute his actions to the majority of Virginians, until (1) Merriam or Webster (I don’t care which) changes the definition of representative, or (2) Virginia votes for the other guy. Until then, George Allen, Virgil Goode, and all Virginians win my Douchebag award. Here you go!
< —Douche
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